Love and RealiTea: Knowing When To Walk Away

Hey CelebriTea,

I have an issue and I wanted some advice. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years and things 60% of the time are great. We have fun together going to the movies, going out to eat, and just chilling in general. However we seem not be able to communicate well. I know I have my shortcomings, when I’m upset I have an attitude where no one can tell me anything. When I get upset my boyfriend just shuts down and won’t talk to me until he thinks I’m not angry anymore and then we never resolve whatever the issue might be. For example I go mad at him because I felt like he didn’t want to spend time with me. He can go play basketball with his boys, and keep his son on the weekend and talk to all his other friends, but he only seems to make time for me if I bring it up. I told him how I felt and instead of being understanding he just walked away and wouldn’t answer any of my phone calls or texts. In fact HE BLOCKED MY NUMBER overnight.

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People always tell me that communication is everything in a relationship, but obviously we don’t know how to do that. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even know when or what to stay because I don’t want him to leave. (He got tired of my attitude before and broke up with me for about 3 months)… I don’t think our relationship is the worst but it damn sure ain’t the best… Do I figure this out or walk away?

Sincerely,

Tati G

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Dear Tati G,

When is comes to relationships, it’s true that communication is everything. If you aren’t on the same page with your partner things can go sour real quick, and it sounds like you guys aren’t even in the same book. It’s not healthy to constantly feel anxiety in a relationship. 60% is a failing grade and if things are only good 60% of the time that’s a failing relationship. No one’s relationship is at 100, but to constantly question whether or not he will leave you is unacceptable.

Like my mom always says “people go to EHarmony.com not E I-want-a-f’d-up-relationship.com”. A bad attitude can make any situation go from bad to worse. Try approaching things in a positive light. Have some type of solution or suggestion when airing your grievances. If he is a non confrontational person then yes your attitude/negativity is going to cause him to not want to talk to you. However, blocking your number because he can’t handle your issues with the relationship is immature. It sounds as if the two of you need to sit down and speak respectfully to each other. You need to not allow your attitude to get in the way, and he needs to listen without shutting down. If the two of you can amicably come together and give 100% to work at the relationship then stay. But if 60% is the best that you’re going to get, then walk away.

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